HANDLING EMOTIONS

this is the very true, pre requisite nature of being adult. sometimes emotions hit like a storm , giant waves and boom you are no where...confused as hell and nothing to be anchor... so the question lingers in my head what to do, how to find anchor or better how to manage and handle emotions.
patience is the key. 

Be gentle with emotions please 
Be honest first and foremost.

step 1 : accept the emotion . its okay to feel so...its really okay to feel so...allow yourself to feel so...dont punish yourself to not even allowing yourself to feel any emotions because you can't. you are a human at the core and you can't fight your biology. 

step 2: Dont fuel it. its okay to feel and act. reduce it slowly slowly. sometimes allowing yourself to do what your emotions wants you to do...but reduce it over a longer period of time. 
because if you straight up cut it , you will be miserable. 

step 3: then one day, try to eliminate or change it. 
 
and this is in regard to any emotion say it positive emotion, negative emotion or any other emotional distress...allowing yourself patience is one of the best thing to deal with emotions. 
it like flying a kite, your goal is to take your kite as high as possible but the sky has no limit. thus sometimes you have to let go thread, sometimes you have to tight it . 
but if you straight up tighten the thread to go up, it will break apart or if you loose it too much , it will fall off. 
this is very simple advice but we forget it in times of distress because the first thing we lose is patience.
 
now let me put some examples to illustrate it 
1. you want to achieve first rank in your class 
and you dont know how to study, what to study and blah blah
first let this emotion of achieving first rank came, you studying but still you think you lack something, you let this emotion come, you think this emotion is positive. now accept this emotion , it okay to feel so . act upon it sometimes and sometimes just let it go...increase this positive emotion slowly as studying slowly slowly more and more ...it must be like as you climb the stairs it got widen . and one day you dont studied , then this emotion puzzle you ... then it okay sometimes ...but the ultimate action is still going upwards...some days may be bad wrt months, some months maybe bad wrt year but still you have to go on and one day you will get the idea that sky has no limit and the overall happiness still comes with achieving but still you try every time.

2. you started to like a boy or girl ,...its okay to feel attraction at any age. you got to know her or him but you started to know that he is not your type. first accept this emotion as its okay to feel attracted . allow yourself to feel attracted towards him. slowly slowly deescalate your situation. try talking to him less , not completely avoid, but try over a period of time to talk less like if 5 days in a week you talk, try to lower it to 4 days , then 3 days and then 2 days and then some day a whole week goes without any talk but sometimes you got an urge to talk to him suddenly ...its still okay but try to lower it subsequently. 

develop patience to deal with emotions. 

Eg. If you have to solve a bunch of threads that got muddled and mingled with each other , you have to very careful and have patience while pulling threads because if you get irritated, you can make the bunch more worse, could break some threads and even make them more complicated.
So as life, every thought, connection or event is that thread, you have to do work but have patience with them. Though it can feel heavy at starting, every thought or event or anything, but give it some time and patiencely carry out things slowly slowly.
And it will not come into being ,just by reading or one day out of nowhere you say I achieved it , but you have to practice and sometimes you fail but pick yourselves up and do things in consistent manner.

There is a popular nazm as 

Chale to kat hi jayega zafar aahista aahista

But to take first step , is the most difficult task. thats why it is said that to initiate first step, you complete half journey.
I understand it's tough and difficult but don't lose hope. 

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