social recognition, validation or attention ?

 i want to do some things . these are some goals which i want to achieve . 

i don't love myself right now, because that is not what i want to be. 

i want to achieve somethings as goals, physical appearance and some academic and some social validation .

for me , social validation , recognition or attention is necessary. not in big amount, just a small amout.

some things which i want to change in myself because of i am not so presentable.

these are not entire my personality, but i need a little amount of social validation for myself.

its like some things i want to do because i like them to do without any public attention, but  for some things, i need people to appreciate me.

But there remains an inherent question, why do I like those things without any social approval...is it because I want to do something that society does not like or i want to become a secretive guy? 

Who knows ? Even I don't know.

for eg. travelling for me is my personal choice, 

exercise , i do it,  not because of my personal choice but because i want to seen as a presentable guy.

i don't want to look older to people.

i am doing it and i am loving myself in the process. i would not say that i like myself just to hide my laziness. i like myself when i am active.

so loving yourself is not an excuse for myself as being lazy.

and is it bad that i want to societal attention ? 

i guess, no. it would be bad if my whole personality build around this fact to please people.

otherwise i need social approval just a little.

as studying the things which i like ...is a middle way...i like it and it also gives me societal approval.

so , middle way is the solution to deal with this thing as purpose behind my actions.

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